LIAR

I AM NOT LIKE HER! I AM NOT LIKE HER! I AM NOT LIKE HER!!!!!

Excuse me miss know it all, miss degree but no phd, miss queen of the universe, miss i need to be the center of attention or i'll hang my face, miss i constantly need to be told i'm beautiful, miss reassure me reassure me reassure me, miss fucking hypocrite!

I admit when shit is real.

FUCK YOU.

FRIGGIN AYE!

JESUS, TAKE THE WHEEL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can't stand this anymore, these sentences are horrid and embarrassing and I can't rewrite them. I know my writing and grammar is not all that but LORDY LORD! We need a crash course in writing memo's stat. I can no longer sit here and edit-edit-edit this shit!

But I have to, *sigh* it pays the bills.

A Moment Like This

I’m having a moment. You know what I’m talking about. The kind where you feel gross and ugly and want to go home and crawl under the covers and watch tv or hide. I hate being a girl sometimes and then I hate when I do things that I KNOW are going to make me feel like crap later on. I say, “you’re gonna regret this…” and guess what? I do.

Ever. Damn. Time.

It’s a rare occasion that I don’t regret shit. So… how come I think things mean something? I mean, can’t shit just… be? Not everything means something, and yet… it does. EVERYTHING means something. I believe God has a purpose for everything. Even the smallest thing. Right?

Because if it doesn’t then I have no idea what I’m doing here. I’m losing my mind. Seriously. I’m fucking losing my mind. I miss people who don’t miss me. I miss people who don’t exist anymore. I miss things that mean nothing and things that mean everything and I miss miss miss miss miss when things weren’t so fucking complicated.

I also miss my cat.

Bohemian Rhapsody

I’m thinking that in 23 minutes I’m going to duck out. Neurotic-Psychotic is not in today, Boss man is busy and Funny man would never snitch. Then again I totally snuck out yesterday to go have Dinner with Carebear, Gin and Dimples. Hmmm… we shall see…

Chiiiillz

You ever hear a song and think of a million different things? Sometimes I get ideas for a story. Sometimes I get ideas for a movie scene. Sometimes I think of a video to make. Most times it makes me remember things that happened in the past…

For example, I hear Kelly Clarkson’s “Sober” and I think about the time I sat in my car in the rain one day for lunch at CR and belted it out. Finch was in his car beside me and we were both… in limbo. I was always in limbo when it concerned him and in a way I guess I always be in limbo with him. Or maybe I’ll actually let go, who knows? Who can predict the future…?

Anyways, so I was just sitting here working and then my ipod plays Beautiful Lie by 30 Seconds to Mars and I was reminded of a scene I wrote for an old ass Roswell fic. Weeeeird! I remember writing it and what I wanted the reader to fill and then I was like well daaaaaaaaamn how old is this song cuz I wrote that AGES ago! Weird and creepy and sad because now I feel old.

That is all.

Fucking FINALLY

It's the end of the day and as I pack my shit and get ready to go, I start to think about everything that has happened today... Shit, shit and more shit. Today was boring but it went by very fast so I definately appreciate that. I am still annoyed by Bimbi and also creepy mccreepster is getting up there on my nerve level. But I survived so... who gives a shit, right?

You know my own mother forgot that she is supposed to pick me up from work today? How rude! She better get here on time... or else I won't let her drive my car. Big whoop on that one. 10 points for badassness... deduct 50 for thinking that was badass... shit.

I'm fukcing bored as hell and I wish I could write for Twilight like those BAMFs who wrote CW&IA, MOTU and WA. Oh well, there is a time and place for everything I suppose. Maybe someday I will finally finish a story and get it published. Until then I'll just continue to bitch!bitch!bitch! :P

Calm like a bomb

IGNITE! IGNITE! IGNITE!

Monday...

I'm fucking drowning....